Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi considering Christianity following hell virgin shortage

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi is said to be considering converting to Christianity, after a shortage of virgins in hell left the promise of 72 to be a gross overestimation.

Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi has been left outraged after promises of 72 virgins upon his death could not be catered for in hell following a vast shortage in virgins being condemned to eternal damnation.

ISIS leader considering a switch in sides

In a last ditch attempt to cross to a better virginal place, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi is considering a switch to Christianity as Jesus operates a forgive all policy.

In a statement released earlier he said, “I have to admit, I’m considering giving the Christian thing a go. I feel like this whole virgin thing has been completely mis-sold to me.

“There’s not a virgin in sight down here, and although you could say I haven’t thought it through, I mean what virgin is getting sent here, right? It was still heavily sold to me when it comes down to it. Bring Jihad, get your virgins.

“Apparently Jesus forgives in a 100% of cases if you ask, it’s an option at the very least”

Mike Oxlong

Trafford Express is for entertainment purposes only, and the drivel contained within it should not be considered factual whatsoever. If anything published on Trafford Express has caused you offence, please rest assured we are not even the slightest bit bothered. Anybody taking this nonsense seriously should seek urgent medical assistance to have their head removed from their arse.

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