Park Road to close permanently Monday to Friday to preserve new tarmac for longer

Park Road Timperley

Trafford Council have made the unpopular decision to permanently close Park Road in Timperley during the week, in a desperate attempt to cut down on spiralling road repair costs.

Park Road in Timperley is being re-laid for the 38th time this year, and due to its legendary Grand Canyon size potholes, Trafford Council intend to close the road during the week to preserve the new tarmac as long as possible.

Council bosses feel continually replacing the shoddy work they paid for is no longer financially viable, and instead of paying a bit extra to do a proper job, they’ve decided to cut use of the busy road down to bare minimum.

Too expensive to keep repairing roads

A source close to the council blamed tax dodgers for the gaping hole in the road repair budget.

She said, “With everybody in Old Trafford, Partington and Stretford continually dodging paying their Council Tax, we can no longer afford to keep repairing busy roads.

“Park Road will be open Saturday and Sunday 9am-11pm to maintain a sensible level of repair work going forward. We voted against doing a proper job to maintain the consistency our constituents expect form us.

“Drivers are welcome to use alternative routes such as Brooklands Road.”


Mike Oxlong

Trafford Express is for entertainment purposes only, and the drivel contained within it should not be considered factual whatsoever. If anything published on Trafford Express has caused you offence, please rest assured we are not even the slightest bit bothered. Anybody taking this nonsense seriously should seek urgent medical assistance to have their head removed from their arse.

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